40-day memorial meal menu
The most significant memorial after the funeral. Usually with the most guests and the fullest table.
At forty days the most people come: relatives from far away, neighbours, colleagues. It's also the memorial at which the family is most exhausted — six weeks of running about have passed. That's why we take it all on, from the colivă to clearing the tables.
How many usually come
The 40-day memorial draws the largest gathering of them all. Our room holds up to 45 people; beyond that, we cook and deliver to wherever the meal is held.
Fasting or not
It depends on the day it falls on. If it's a fasting day, we go with the lenten menu; if not, the non-fasting one. We'll tell you which fits, if you're not sure.
Colivă, colaci and packages
Colivă and colaci are part of what we prepare. Packages for those who can't stay are made in advance, so people can take them as they leave.
How the day is counted
The forty days are counted from the day of death, not from the funeral, and the day of death counts as the first. Because of that, the count comes out a day earlier than most people expect, and families who count from the funeral end up telling everyone the wrong day.
If the day falls when services can't be held, the memorial is usually moved to the Saturday before. That isn't our decision — it's settled with the priest holding the service. Call us with the date he gives you, not the one from your own count.
How many come, and estimating portions
At forty days more people come than at any other memorial: relatives from far away, neighbours, colleagues, people who couldn't make the funeral. It's also the interval at which the number is most often got wrong, almost always too low.
The practical advice we give everyone: count how many were at the funeral and prepare for about the same. Better that food is left over — it gets packed and goes home with people — than that it runs out. Give us an approximate number when you book and we'll adjust it a few days before, when you know more surely.
What goes on the table
The pattern is the same whether the meal is lenten or not: it begins with cold starters, then soup, then the main course, and ends with colivă, colaci and a dessert. What changes is the dishes, not the order.
Colivă is placed on the table and shared out after the service. Colaci are given to those who helped at the funeral and to close relatives — how many is decided within the family or according to the priest, and we make as many as you ask for.
Packages for those who can't stay
Many of those invited can't stay for the meal — they're at work, they have a long drive, they have small children. Packages are prepared for them, with the same dishes, to take as they leave.
They're best ready before people start getting up from the table. We make them in advance, and if you want more than the number of guests staying, tell us when you order and we'll add them.
Frequently asked
What families ask us
How far in advance should I order?
At least 10 days before. At forty days the date is known from the start, so it can be booked ahead — and at a meal with many guests the notice really matters, because the produce is bought for everyone at once.
How many people fit in the room?
Up to 45. Beyond that, we cook and deliver to wherever the meal is held — at home, at another venue, or at a memorial hall.
What if I don't know exactly how many are coming?
Give us an approximate number when you book and we'll adjust a few days before. At forty days it's normal not to know at first — people confirm late.
Does the meal have to be held on that exact day?
Usually yes, but when the day falls awkwardly it's moved to the Saturday before. Ask the priest holding the service and tell us his date.
Can the meal be held at home?
Yes, that's the most common arrangement. We cook and deliver to the address where the meal is held, if there isn't room at home to cook for that many.